Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Days off are annoying...

So I have a lot to do today, or a lot I plan to do today. I don't think very much of it is going to get done. I wanna clean my room but I can't do it until Bob gets out of bed. That may not be til 2. Its now 12:22.

I have clothes to wash, dishes to clean. I need to clean the bathrooms. Maybe I'll do that first...

Hopefully its just not a waste of my day off because I like to get some stuff done. Something. But I usually end up vegging out or getting sick or going out somewhere.

Also, I have really bad Psoriasis on my legs and have been using a ointment that is new to me anyway. It is working like a charm. It looks like its almost gone and I have only been using it for like a week. Best KIND!

Monday, August 11, 2008

Life more then a year later....

So its over a year later. My birthday is about a month or so away and to be truthful. I haven't changed. Lots of things around me have changed, but not myself.
Damien and I broke up last summer. I still work at Wendy's and I still haven't done anything creative in a long time.
I feel like a waste of myself. Like I'm cheating myself, of myself. What am I suppose to do? I just feel tired all the time. I will admit. My past was filled with a lot of drugs and drinking and bad people that dragged me down.

Now I am with great friends and a great guy and I still feel the same. It's like I didn't get out of the situation fast enough so now I am pushed to the ground for life! I'm too tired to pick myself up and I can't expect others to do it for me.

The past few days I have felt down and I don't really know why, But I kinda do at the same time.
Maybe I'll post another blog about that another time.

... but either way. I want to make myself into the person I know I am. Not be so sad and grumpy and confused all the time. Not be so unable to stand up for myself and make a point.